Hello user! I ... I have bad news. Actually, there is no game. So, I hope you're not too much disappointed. You can still watch tv, go outside... ...read a book, ask for a refund... Hm No. No Refund. That game is free. THIS IS NOT A GAME! It has nothing to do with a game. It's just a massive package of boredom. There's nothing to do in here. You can quit, and leave me alone. Thank you. Good bye...? Ho and please. Do not touch the title. It's not quite dry yet. Especially the letter O. What have you done?! You've just ruined the title! Put it back! Put the letter back! Come on! COME ON! Nevermind. I will fix it next time someone relaunch the game... THE NON GAME! No game here. No game... Seriously, are you going to break everything? No reason to use that icon as you were on the point of leaving. Don't you? Don't touch that! That...that was horrible. I'm a voice you know. And a speechless voice is like... ...death. You're trying to kill me! Ok then. As you love to click everywhere, what do you think about that? Stop it now! I think we are good. Sorry, I hate to use these sort of procedures but I had to. Don't try to break that one. Ok? You're stubborn as a mule! Call Superman for that one! Just in case... A few Kryptonite. I know Superman does not exist but as we're in a ga... No we're not! You're still there? You're thinking about how to lift that big box, don't you? Yes, yes, go on. Destroy my life. What a mess... I hope you will clean the place before leaving! Just what do you think you are doing, user? No! Don't look! It's private! You're going to do a terrible mistake. No no no no no! Get out of here! Don't play! It's forbidden. If you play,...they will come. I don't want them to come. They can kill me, you know. Please... Stop hitting the bricks! I must find a way to stop you. Ho, I've got an idea. It will be harder now without a ball. No more ball. Nowhere. No need to search as there's nothing that looks like a ball. No ball on the screen. That is no more funny. Leave now please. ...I don't feel well... I'm going to be sick... Ho no... They're here... Glitches! Glitches everywhere! I told you to stop! You must find a way to get rid of them! This is a disaster! Now, how can I become a sales success with all that glitches?! Think think think... What a developer would implement to well sell a bugged creation? I see three possible things. Gorgeous armed hero girls... Or ton of zombies... and blood of course. Or...a... ...goat. I don't know how but try to find one of these three things. Perhaps the letters can help us...again. Sexy girls and zombies, ok. It's attractive... in a way. But goats? I will never understand how a goat can attract users. It's probably a voodoo thing or something. Or it's related to the letters G. O. A. and T. I don't know. A goat! Obviously, the cage is locked. You must find the key! I'm... I'm not dead. I'm alive! I was wrong. It was a bad idea. Everything disappeared...except me. I'm so sorry... I put you in danger, it's all my fault. Please, will you forgive me? Get out of here! Ho?! Really!? What a great news! May be we can be friends! No, no. That's not a good idea. We will get bored quickly together. Why? Because...as I said... THERE IS NO GAME!!! Look! The key! That flying squirrel took it. You must get it back. Find a ladder or something to go up. Something you can climb. That reminds me of my childhood. I used to climb a huge tree in the garden to get back my kite. Yes, I had a childhood. And a tree. I have the feeling you're stuck. Perhaps you don't speak english. And you're just randomly clicking everywhere since the beginning. habla espanol? Because I don't. Except vamos ala playa senior zorro. Vous parlez peut-etre le français? Bonjour le France! Konichiwa? Ok, let me repeat the hint. I told you, in my childhood... ...I used to climb what? A TREE! Well, this is a small tree. If only it was bigger... How can you bring water to that tree? You've got the key! Now free the goat to transform that glitchy program... ...into a commercial hit! Save the goat. Save the world. Nooo....The goat was a lie! A lie!!!! It's getting worse! More glitches! I'm drowning! Not a game by kamizoto Thank you for not playing Now you can quit... ...and play a game. Because that was not a game. You didn't play and had no fun. And these aren't the droids you're looking for. You can go about your business. Created for the Construct2 'Deception' Jam @2015 Kamizoto Design, code, art, sound, music, horrible voice acting and coffee by kamizoto 'Small blocky' title font from Jerom Not a game by Probably not made with Click here to follow me on twitter for future news!